Start (blog)

Will the game of Sorry! be under your Christmas tree this year?All different kinds of people play the game, but I think they fall into two main categories: the mischievous ones who wait with glee for a chance to send someone back to Start, and everyone else.Sometimes I wish I was more like the first kind.We all wait eagerly for that number 1 or 2 card that gets us out into play on the board. But once we're there, anxious people like me can't enjoy the game because we worry too much about what cards everyone else is picking.Is someone going to "Sorry!" me?We don't like being out there in all of that uncertainty.When I first started going to church I was surprised to find so many different kinds of people there, all just as 'real' as me. There are mischievous ones, anxious ones, and everyone else in between.Recently I was talking with a friend who isn't part of a church family (yet), and she asked me about my faith in Jesus."If you trust in him," she said, "then why are you anxious like me?"Back to Start!It's true, there's still a lot of work to do in me.At church the pastors talk about how we're not really all that different from other people. It's good to be reminded of my sin and failures. I need that, every week.One of my greatest fears has always been that people out in the community will look but won't see any difference, that they won't see Jesus in me. No salt. No light. No great mercy, kindness or compassion.Is anxiety all that they will ever see in me?It's a paralyzing fear, and would keep me from ever moving beyond Start in my relationships, except for one game-changing thing.Forgiveness.The pastors also remind us (all the more) that, as Christians, we know and trust that we are forgiven by God.And saved, by Jesus!This is what sets us apart, what makes us different. It's the foundation of our Christian faith. It's where we all start when we go out to be with people in our communities.It's the part of us that we most want them to see.And in order to let them see the saving work that Jesus has done and is doing in me, I'm going to have to be real, to let people see the whole truth about me.That's the part that makes me anxious!But it's not that hard. I just have to let my friend see that she's right, I'm no different than her, except that I believe in the One who was born into the world to make God's love and forgiveness real. Jesus came to be all that my friend and I cannot be. I trust in Jesus eternally, and I believe that He will finish the good work He began in me.What can I compare it to, this trust I have in Jesus? It's like being out there in the game with the certainty that He's already seen me, and is going to see me, safely all the way Home.What an amazing thing, and what a powerful witness, that someone anxious like me can enjoy such peace!